My journey to chaplaincy work.

I first started considering chaplaincy after my paternal grandmother died in 2012. She was the first person who I had been with as they were actively dying. It was a hard experience for a number of reasons, but I remember speaking with someone from hospice who helped me in the process. The person was so caring and so present in our exchanges. I wanted to be able to do that for others.

It would take another seven years before I would finally start my training when I was accepted into the Upaya Zen Center’s Buddhist Chaplaincy Training Program. It would be another two years before I was able to start the program in 2021. I spent three years working deeply on the inner journey of spiritual formation and the outer journey of being with those in need of care before graduating in March 2024.

To say the chaplaincy training program changed my life feels like an understatement. My internal landscape is truly different, as is my way of moving through the world. It helped me to see the value of simply being with people. Time and time again, I see how much we just aren’t present with each other. This simple act can change the situation, especially if it’s a hard one.

When I started the training, I didn’t know what I would focus on in my final project. When I lost my cat Thor in the middle of the program, I decided to work with animal chaplaincy. I have been through a lot of loss in my life, but losing my companion of almost eighteen years was beyond what I expected. It was a deep well of grief that I’m still not sure I’ve touched the bottom of yet. (More on this another time.)

My final project for Upaya.

Throughout my training, I encountered a lot of different scenarios from my time on the Crisis Text Line to the celebrations and losses in my own and loved ones’ lives. I discovered how to bring my chaplaincy work into my “day job” and into my relationships. I found ways to work with the spiritual and not (or the spiritual hiding behind the not), so that chaplaincy can support whatever that means for you. Maybe it’s embedded in things and not so overtly present or maybe it’s at the fore. Every person and every situation is its own and deserves to be honored for what it is.

I feel a calling to specialize in grief (I’ve experienced so much), animal loss and hospice (in honor of my dear Thor), and life transitions (because there are so many). Something that has become clear to me is that we all need support sometimes, we all need to be seen in our suffering and in our joys. I know it’s hard to reach out when we’re in the middle of it, but my hope is to keep my door open for others.

I hope you know there’s some time on my schedule just for you.